eNEWSLETTER
April 2006
Our Mission Statement:
"Providing a range of innovative professional services, empowering our clients to positively address issues affecting their lives."
Welcome to the April edition of Clayfield Counselling Services e-newsletter. We trust that you had a safe and happy Easter holiday. For all of you who ate one too many chocolate eggs over the holidays and are now thinking of giving up your diet altogether, this one’s for you!
Making mistakes and moving on
Have you ever noticed how some people just seem to walk through life moving from strength to strength, while others make one mistake, get knocked down and never seem to be able to recover? Everyone makes mistakes, there’s no harm in getting things wrong occasionally but problems occur when you are reluctant to try something new for fear of making a mistake, or when you use a mistake as an excuse to give up.
Find the silver lining
Our mistakes can make us better, stronger and wiser if we are willing to pay attention and change. We have to be willing to admit our failures and accept responsibility for our actions though, and this is where many people fall down. It’s so common to see someone make the same mistake over and over again and each time things begin to unravel, they will blame everyone else except themselves. People often make decisions according to bad habits; they will be attracted to the same kind of unhealthy person or they’ll continue to have the same argument with a loved one; sometimes for years. For some the habit is alcohol or drugs and for others it’s violence or sexual addiction. Commonly these habits are learned through watching our adult caregivers and other influential people during our childhood and adolescence. All of these habits result in harm to oneself and to others and all of these habits can be changed. Each time we make a mistake we are presented with an opportunity to learn. Sometimes the lesson isn’t clear and we have to really stop and think but there is always something positive to take away from even the most negative experience.
Don’t accept defeat
When Donald Trump failed to lower his prices in order to challenge his competitors he lost his fortune but instead of giving up, he chose to work his way back to the top again. He didn’t allow his mistake to shame him into inertia; he worked his way back up the corporate ladder and is now one of the wealthiest men in the world.
Mistakes are only a problem if they cause us to doubt ourselves. It’s when we stop believing in our own abilities that we cease trying to succeed; it’s then that we’re defeated before we even try.
Change the pattern
If you see a pattern in your life that continually results in problems or heartache, stop what you’re doing and rethink your behaviour. Are you repeating a habit you’ve learned during childhood? Perhaps it’s self talk that’s the problem and you’re telling yourself something that just isn’t true for you anymore? Sometimes the pattern is so heavily entrenched that it can be difficult to see it for what it is. This is when counselling can really help.
A counsellor is often able to identify a habit or learned behaviour that keeps causing problems for you in your life and can assist you with strategies to change the behaviour. If you’d like some help in changing an old habit or learned behaviour, why not give us a call and make an appointment? It doesn’t matter what your upbringing was like or how many mistakes you’ve made in the past. Your future is a blank canvas and whether or not a masterpiece will ever be revealed is entirely up to you. So go on, choose a paintbrush- what will you paint today?
Some interesting links
Office hours are from 9am to 5pm Monday to Friday. After hours and Saturday appointments are available on request.
Until next time then...
“If you have made mistakes, even serious ones, there is always another chance for you. What we call failure is not the falling down but the staying down.” - Mary Pickford